Realistically as a super hero if you hear “the hulk is on a rampage” and your super power is something simple like flight or invisibility, you really gonna go try to stop him? Or will you just turn your phone off and fake like you were asleep the whole time?
As long as he aint in my front yard that nigga can stay mad.
On everything I’m flying my ass in the opposite direction.
the city folk: “Invisi-Boy help! The Hulk is destroying Townsville!!”
Bad News: Our boss locked the keys inside the building.
Good News: We didn’t have to wait around for a locksmith.
Bad News: My boss finds it very concerning that I know how to pick locks, and tried to unlock my Tragic Backstory™. I was too embarrassed to admit that the reason I learned was because, at thirteen, I figured that was the kind of skill that would impress cute girls.
Good News: A cute girl saw me do it.
Bad News: It was Maggie, and since she’s already seen me fall out of several trees, cry because I saw a fawn that was just too damn small, and knows I can ride a unicycle, she’ll never think I’m cool no matter what I do. It’s too late. She knows.
There are million dollar blockbuster movies that were less entertaining than the rollercoaster this post just took me on.
My husband and I are surprising our 6 year old by taking him to Disney for his b-day tomorrow. We’ve been in the car for 4+ hours and he still thinks we are on our way home from school. He keeps saying “looks like we’re almost home!” 😂
Bless his heart.
Update: we arrived to Disney World, he thinks we took a wrong turn and is very concerned about who is going to feed our cat.
